Monday, March 25, 2013
Normal? Or a New Normal?
My life, and the life of my family has been completely flipped upside down since my Mammaw fell, received surgery, then was put in rehab. I found, what I thought, was our new normal. Then, a month later, she had a stroke that left her with minimal speech, and then went back to rehab. I was fearful to leave her. It was as if I felt I could stop another "bad thing" from happening.
My presence didn't matter. It took me a few long weeks of ignoring my home, running to and from the nursing home (rehab), and being completely emotionally and physically exhausted to realize, the only Presence that mattered, was Him.
This beautiful woman, who helped shape my faith, taught me to trust Him, and loved me unconditionally, taught me, in the midst of her storm, that even in this, I should trust Him. She didn't say anything, she may not have even known I struggled, but her own attitude and dedication, and determination to read her Bible and excitement over seeing her brother-in-law come to know Jesus, was enough for me.
What I've come to know, or at least relearn, is that we aren't promised perfect lives. And for now, THIS is my new normal, I can accept and deal with it, trusting His perfect guidance, or I can sulk and groan about how I don't like it or want what "was." I know the precious lady who has taught me so many lessons in life isn't groaning. She's accepting each day as it comes, trusting Him to lead her through.
Thank you Father, for this precious being who even in her own time of need, is teaching lessons.....Amen